Inane Horoscopes for May 2023

  1. Aries: You will successfully tie your shoes today, impressing no one but yourself.
  2. Taurus: You will find a new favorite pen today, and it will bring you inexplicable joy.
  3. Gemini: You will wear a shirt today, and no one will comment on it.
  4. Cancer: You will listen to a song today, and it will resonate with you in a mildly pleasant way.
  5. Leo: You will make a joke today, and it will be met with polite laughter.
  6. Virgo: You will make a to-do list today, and then promptly forget about it.
  7. Libra: You will see a cute animal today, and it will briefly improve your mood.
  8. Scorpio: You will overhear an interesting conversation today, and then immediately forget what it was about.
  9. Sagittarius: You will read a mildly amusing joke today, and then promptly forget about it.
  10. Capricorn: You will successfully balance your checkbook today, and no one will care.
  11. Aquarius: You will learn a useless fact today, and then struggle to find a way to incorporate it into a conversation.
  12. Pisces: You will see a cloud that looks like a familiar shape today, and then forget what it was by the end of the day.

ChatGPT Nonsense Story About A Man Pooping Himself

Please accept my sincerest apologies for the low level of maturity on this blog post.

I presented this prompt to Chat GPT:

Write a silly story about a grown man who was day-dreaming about robocop in church and then falls asleep and accidentally poops himself.

Honestly, I was shocked that it accommodated me without scolding me for the subject matter.

Once upon a time, there was a grown man named Tom who had a fascination with Robocop. He was sitting in church one Sunday, daydreaming about Robocop saving the day when suddenly he dozed off.

As Tom drifted off into a deep sleep, his subconscious mind took him on a wild adventure. He found himself in a futuristic world where he was the sidekick of Robocop. Together they fought off villains and saved the world. It was an exhilarating experience for Tom, and he lost track of time.

Unfortunately, Tom’s body wasn’t as excited about his adventure as his mind was. He had eaten a large burrito the night before, and his stomach was feeling uneasy. While he was sleeping, Tom accidentally pooped himself. The smell was so bad that it woke him up, and he quickly realized what had happened.

Tom was mortified. He tried to pretend like nothing had happened, but the smell was too strong, and everyone around him started to notice. People were trying to hold their breath and move away from him, and Tom wished he could disappear.

After the service ended, Tom bolted out of the church and ran all the way home, too embarrassed to show his face to anyone. From that day forward, he never daydreamed about Robocop in church again, and he always made sure to use the bathroom before leaving the house.