Time Collapsing

“It would suck, wouldn’t it, if time collapsed in on itself?” I heard a random man say at a NYE party on December 31st, 1999. I believe he was speaking in general terms and not about NYE itself. I found myself agreeing with him silently. It would suck. Then he said it again. Before long he had said it near countless times. It turns out he was having a very bad acid trip. He was then sequestered in a room and began slamming furniture around. Some other people I also didn’t know evidently dropped him at a local ER and sped away. I felt bad for him.

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Prayer

Acting Governor Dan Patrick (gross) and Senator Ted Cruz (gag me) are begging people to pray for the people lost in the hill country flooding. Let me be frank: Prayer does nothing. Commenting “Prayers” on a tragic Facebook post is laughable. Those people aren’t even actually praying. They’re just typing a word – a worthless word. Prayer is a way of absolving yourself from taking actual action. If you feel like you can help, then help. In real life.…

Strange Dream

I watched Strange Days yesterday, which featured Juliette Lewis topless. Last night, I dreamed that I ran into her at an airport. Apparently, she really liked me, and we made out for a long time. Then, for no apparent reason, I was topless for a while. We walked past some of my family and friends, who played it cool and just gave her finger guns or whatever. After she left, she texted me her hotel room. For some reason, I decided not to go.

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