May 23

Beyond Star Trek Beyond

For the record: Whatever the next Star Trek movie is, it will not be “Star Trek 4” FFS. It’s Star Trek 14. When we went to the free Star Trek event at the DMA, a pair of teenagers appeared to be on a date. The girl seemed to be trying to make small talk with the awkward young man. She said, “So… How many Star Trek movies are there?” I became excited and rudely blurted out “Thirteen!” He said, “I was going to say ‘three’. I forgot about the old ones.”

Enterprise - NCC-1701-A (Star Trek Beyond - 2016)
Enterprise – NCC-1701-A (Star Trek Beyond – 2016)


May 02

When I Was a Kid

When I was in kindergarten my school was doing a stage show for the parents. All of the different grades had at least one performance to do. My afternoon class was doing something to the tune of “The Farmer in the Dell.” For many weeks before the show we would practice in our classroom. Somehow, I was to be the “Farmer.” The children held hands to make a large circle. I, the farmer, stood in the middle. The children walked around and around me and sang:

The Farmer in the Dell
The Farmer in the Dell
Hi-Ho the Derry-O
The Farmer in the Dell

At this point it comes to a part in which the farmer picks his wife, and so on. Every time we practiced I invariably chose a classmate named Leigh Barker to be my “wife.” When the day of the performance came we went on stage, and I was scared. I hated being the center of attention. The song came to “The farmer picks his wife” and I pointed at my friend Neal Gray. Everyone in the audience laughed at me that day.

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